THE WEST WING
"ENEMIES FOREIGN AND DOMESTIC"
WRITTEN BY: PAUL REDFORD AND AARON SORKIN
DIRECTED BY: ALEX GRAVES
TEASER
MONDAY
FADE IN: INT. JOSH'S BULLPEN AREA - DAY
Carol is sitting at her desk, sipping coffee and looking through the morning wires.
She highlights a piece on Saudi Arabia and tries to print it, but gets a message
that the network printer is in use.
CAROL
Whoever's on the printer, get off! Now!
STAFFER [OS]
That's me!
CAROL
Get off!
CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - DAY
C.J., Sam, Toby, and a few people are inside.
SAM
You want to make it clear that we're pushing for Slovenia and possibly the Baltic
states. Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania.
C.J.
Not Fredonia? We're going to leave Fredonia out there?
TOBY
The point is, the zero option's off the table.
C.J.
Hooray for Captain Spalding...
TOBY
Can we please?
C.J.
Hey, aren't we pretty much admitting all the countries we formed NATO to fight?
TOBY
Yes.
C.J.
Then why not dissolve it?
TOBY
We like the bomber jackets.
Carol approaches from outside.
C.J.
[to Toby] See, when you make a joke...
TOBY
My jokes are funny.
C.J.
Fredonia was pretty good.
TOBY
Heard it.
Carol passes papers to C.J.. Ginger comes in with a coffee cup for Sam.
C.J.
[to Toby] I'll give you $500 if you perform "Lydia the Tattooed Lady" at this year's Gridiron.
SAM
[to Toby] She's got to get in there. Can we talk about sugar subsidies?
TOBY
We're not done talking about the summit!
SAM
It's a two-day grip and grin.
TOBY
And, you know, you of all people... the Russians finally elect a reformer, and you still...
SAM
20 years in the KGB, an election that will make Tammy Hall look like the League of
Woman Voters... I'm not sure that qualifies as a... C.J.?
Both turn to C.J. who has finished reading the paper Carol handed her.
C.J.
[reads, swaying in one spot] There was a fire at the King Fatah Middle School in Media.
Seventeen girls died in the fire, when they were prevented from coming out into the
street and rescue workers were prevented from saving them.
SAM
[stands up] What was preventing them?
C.J.
The Muttawa. The girls weren't dressed properly. Don't comment! I haven't spoken to
the President, to Leo, to State, to anybody. You guys want to muzzle me before I go
in there, speak now or forever hold your peace. God knows it's not likely I'm gonna.
C.J. walks out of her office.
TOBY
[to Sam] Let's get a good spot.
CUT TO: INT. ENTRANCE TO THE PRESS AREA - DAY
C.J. pauses a moment before walking into the Press Room. Carol follows, Toby and Sam
stay behind.
C.J.
Good morning!
REPORTERS
Good morning!
C.J.
I have some scheduled details on the summit. Air Force One will depart Andrews at
7pm Friday, arriving at Helsinki 4am Eastern time, that's 11am Saturday local.
Presidents Bartlet and Chigorin will have their first meeting at three o'clock at
Mantyniemi - that's change, photo op, stills only, at the beginning of the meeting.
KATIE
C.J.? What does the President see as the goals of the summit?
C.J.
Well, first to meet the new Russian president, but they show the aspiration of
building a secure and undivided Europe.
STEVE
C.J., are you aware of the fire that happened at King Fatah Middle School?
C.J.
Yeah, that's a tragedy. Chris?
CHRIS
Saudi news is reporting that rescuers were prevented from getting to several female
students by religious police.
C.J.
Yeah, I read that too. Steve.
CHRIS
Does the White House have a comment?
C.J.
I literally just got this a minute and a half ago. I haven't spoken to the President,
or Chief of Staff, State or anyone in communications, this is just me.
STEVE
Well, do you have a comment?
C.J.
I don't, no.
STEVE
I'm sorry, C.J., but you're not outraged by this?
C.J.
[beat] Outraged? I'm barely surprised. This is a country where women aren't allowed
to drive a car. They're not allowed to be in the company of any man other than a close
relative, they're required to adhere to a dress code that would make the Maryknoll Nun
look like Malibu Barbie. They beheaded 121 people last year for robbery, rape, and drug
trafficking, they've no free press, no elected government, no political parties, and
the royal family allows the religious police to travel in groups of six, carrying
nightsticks and they freely and publicly beat women. But "Brutus is an honorable man."
Seventeen schoolgirls were forced to burn alive because they weren't wearing the proper
clothing. Am I outraged? No, Steve. No Chris. No, Mark. That is Saudi Arabia, our
partners in peace. Bonnie, then Scott.
SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES.
END TEASER
* * *
ACT ONE
FADE IN: INT. COMMUNICATIONS OFFICE - DAY
Sam is inside taking papers from Ginger as Charlie walks in.
CHARLIE
Sam, you know a guy named Farley who worked here before I did?
SAM
Where did he work?
CHARLIE
He worked for the President.
SAM
No. What's his first name?
CHARLIE
I don't know. A kid wrote a letter to the President saying that when he was governor
and campaigning, that he met his assistant Mr. Farley.
They walk up to SAM'S OFFICE.
SAM
It's probably one of the guys early on. I didn't know any of them.
CHARLIE
Yeah, except it couldn't have been from that early on, 'cause the kid says they met
when his father took him to the speech about the budget in Pittsburgh.
SAM
[walks out] You mean San-Diego.
CHARLIE
He says Pittsburgh.
SAM
[taking more papers from Ginger] We never did a budget speech in Pittsburgh.
CHARLIE
This is a little weird.
SAM
Well, how many weird letters does the President get a day?
CHARLIE
[follows Sam around] Couple of thousand, but this one had the President private
mail code on it, that's why I got it.
SAM
Well, how many confused people does the President befriend every day?
CHARLIE
Couple of dozen, but he doesn't give them the private mail code.They stop in front
of the Roosevelt Room.
SAM
I don't know. I'm on with the Russians.
Charlie walks off, Sam opens the door to THE ROOSEVELT ROOM. There are two men inside.
SAM
Good morning, I'm Sam Seaborn.
NIKOLAI IVANOVICH
Nikolai Ivanovich.
GEORGE KOZLOWSKI
George Kozlowski.
SAM
[shakes their hands] Thanks for coming by. This should be quick.
They settle around the table, Sam opposite the two Russians.
SAM
Let me first say that President Bartlet is looking forward to meeting with President
Chigorin and having a mutually productive meeting.
KOZLOWSKI
Mr. Seaborn, uh, we understood that the protocol arrangements have been... have been
finalized by the... by the advance teams in Helsinki.
SAM
That's right, but there are points I'd like to revisit. My thinking being - I could
relay my concerns to you at the embassy and you could send them on to Moscow and
hopefully, get an answer quickly 'cause we're coming down with it now.
KOZLOWSKI
I'm sorry, I... uh...
SAM
It's coming up quickly. The summit, it's Saturday, and this is Monday.
KOZLOWSKI
Ah, yes, yes.
SAM
We've agreed to a consecutive translation?
IVANOVICH
Yes.
SAM
I'd like to change that to a simultaneous translation.
IVANOVICH
They prefer that the two leaders pause while their remarks are... rendered? Rendered
into their particular language.
SAM
President Bartlet has a rhythm to his speaking pattern, and it's best if it's
uninterrupted. That's the only reason I bring it up.
IVANOVICH
We'll pass that on.
SAM
I'm sorry, pass it on?
IVANOVICH
Yes.
SAM
[smiles uncertainly] I'm sorry, it's just that one is good and one is bad. We'd already
agreed on the Grand Salon in Finlandia Hall for the 6:00 meeting and I wanted to change
that to the Hall of Flags.
IVANOVICH
Hall of Flags. Didn't we agree 3:00 for that meeting?
SAM
It's funny you should mention that.
IVANOVICH
I'm sorry?
SAM
It's funny... [thinks about his choice of words] It's a coincidence that you should happen
to mention the time of the meeting. See, President Chigorin only has to fly through one
time zone. President Bartlet has to fly through seven. Don't get me wrong, this President
can do three shows a night, but there's no one in the Western Hemisphere who has a worse
reaction to jetlag than he does. Any trip 8 hours or longer and someone gets fired at the
end of it, and it's already been me three times, so...
IVANOVICH
We'll pass it on.
SAM
I think everyone on the White House staff would agree when I say that one is a deal-breaker.
IVANOVICH
All right, then. Was there anything else?
SAM
Oh, yeah, we're just getting started. You guys hungry?
IVANOVICH
No.
SAM
[flips notepad open] Okay.
CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - DAY
Donna is inside when C.J. comes in with papers.
DONNA
You ready?
C.J.
Yeah. Where are we going?
DONNA
The yogurt place. Are those angry faxes?
C.J.
[looking through papers] Yeah. They're very angry faxes.
DONNA
From Saudis?
C.J.
Yeah.
DONNA
Well, what did you expect?
C.J.
Very angry faxes from Saudis and angry e-mails. Look at these.
C.J. points to her laptop, and Donna sits at her desk to read off the screen.
DONNA
I'm seeing some troubling spelling here. 'Godless' with two "d's."
C.J.
[takes her purse] Let's go.
DONNA
Hang on. C.J....
C.J.
I saw it.
DONNA
It's a death threat.
C.J.
It's not a big deal.
DONNA
You sure?
C.J.
Yeah. Don't tell anybody, okay, I don't want a lot of production.
DONNA
All right.
C.J.
Thanks.
DONNA
[shouts] Josh! Can you come in here an look at this, please?
C.J.
Donna?!
Donna makes a face at her. Josh pops by at the door.
JOSH
Look at what?
DONNA
C.J.'s e-mail.
Josh looks at the e-mail. C.J. waits impatiently.
JOSH
Call Frank Tenney downstairs. Tell him I want to talk to him right away.
DONNA
Yeah. [runs off]
C.J.
You take this seriously?
JOSH
Yeah, it's a death threat, C.J., I take it seriously. [stands up] I had some
experience with this. [walks out]
CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY
Bartlet is inside with a crowd.
BARTLET
Thank you all so much. Bye-bye.
People thank him and leave. He walks over to his desk. Leo follows.
BARTLET
Bye-bye.
LEO
They have a picture they want to show us.
BARTLET
Of what?
LEO
I don't know. [beat] We've got a problem. Jake Kimball came to see me this morning.
BARTLET
What's he doing here?
LEO
Looking a hundred years old. Antares is going to announce the chip recall on Thursday.
BARTLET
How big?
LEO
Everything.
BARTLET
[takes off his glasses] What are you talking about?
LEO
They discovered a problem with one of the...
BARTLET
That's got to be 50 million chips!
LEO
80 million.
BARTLET
Leo, how the hell did...
LEO
I know.
BARTLET
That's the end of Antares.
LEO
Yeah.
BARTLET
98 thousand workers, I think 75 thousand in the US. Plus the kidney punch at NASDAQ...
LEO
I think Jake's going to put a shotgun in his mouth, I really do.
Charlie walks inside.
CHARLIE
Sir...
BARTLET
Yeah.
Fitzwallace walks in. A few people in uniform follow.
FITZWALLACE
Mr. President.
BARTLET
[hurries to shake his hand] Fitz! Fitz, you old polecat, you old so-and-so!
FITZWALLACE
You trying to be one of the fellows, sir?
BARTLET
Yeah.
FITZWALLACE
Well, well-done, sir.
BARTLET
Thank you.
FITZWALLACE
This picture was taken by an SR-71 during a routine flight over in the Gulf. This is
Bushehr, and this is what looks to me like the early days of construction of a light
water reactor. Light water is... ordinary water, sir, it's tap water. It's Perrier.
BARTLET
Yeah.
FITZWALLACE
Light water is what's used for nuclear reactors and the Iranians have contracted the
Russians to build them a light water reactor for that purpose.
BARTLET
What's the problem?
FITZWALLACE
Four intelligence agencies are telling me I'm wrong, and I am. The Russians are building
them a heavy water reactor.
BARTLET
What do you use heavy water for?
LEO
Plutonium.
FADE OUT.
END ACT ONE
* * *
ACT TWO
FADE IN: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE LOBBY - DAY
TUESDAY
Toby walks up to a guard.
TOBY
Good morning, Janice!
JANICE
Good morning, Mr. Ziegler.
TOBY
I think it's time we made it 'Toby.'
JANICE
Okay.
TOBY
That's a nice uniform. How long have you guys had that uniform?
JANICE
About a thousand years.
TOBY
Okay.
C.J. walks up and swipes her ID through the machine.
C.J.
Hey, Toby.
TOBY
[to Janice] Excuse me. [follows C.J. inside] I'm gonna tell you something, you ready?
C.J.
What?
TOBY
I've got nothing to do.
C.J.
[checks her mailbox] What do you mean?
They reach the BULLPEN AREA.
TOBY
[laughs] I got to the office at six and it turned out that everything I was supposed
to do got done by seven thirty; some strange fluke of the calendar, so I'm just out
here walking around. You know, just being in the world.
C.J.
In the hallways.
TOBY
Yeah. Well, you know, yeah.
C.J.
Well, I'm gonna change all that. I'd like you to meet with a Russian reporter named
Ludmila Koss, she's the Washington correspondent for the Novaya Gazeta, she wants
credentials and a seat on the press charter.
TOBY
Why is she asking us?
C.J.
The Russians banned her from the summit.
TOBY
Why?
C.J.
She supported the other guy.
TOBY
Aha. Time to teach these Stoli-drinking Tchaikovskys a thing or two about free press
American style! You don't ban those who supported you opponent, you make them wallow
in their losedom by covering your victory. You sit them in the front row. You give
them a hat! I will save Ludmila Koss, for I am Toby, and in doing so... Why am I going
on like this?
C.J.
[smiles] I don't know.
TOBY
Set up the meeting. Obviously, I have a little time.
C.J.
Thank you.
They walk in different directions.
CUT TO: INT: C.J.'S OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
C.J. walks in as Ron Butterfield is standing inside.
C.J.
Ron?
RON
C.J., Frank Tenney spoke to me this morning.
C.J.
Yeah, Josh made me see him yesterday. He filed everything he was supposed to file.
RON
Can I see the message?
C.J.
It's just, you know, it's what it is...
RON
Could you type in your password? You checked your e-mail yet today?
C.J.
I just got here. [opens her e-mail]
RON
Okay, he sent another one at 5:20 this morning. Have you had cyber-threats like this before?
C.J.
Not explicitly.
RON
Agent Tenney says that you don't recognize the sender's address.
C.J.
No.
RON
Have you had a bad breakup with a boyfriend lately?
C.J.
Come on, Ron, I haven't had a boyfriend in a... I get a lot of hate mail. After the
President, I'm the single most visible person in the Federal government, every day I'm
on TV and every day exactly half the people are going to disagree with you and some of
those people are going to hate you and some of those are gonna write letters.
RON
Yeah, this isn't hate mail, this is a death threat. Can I use your computer for a second?
C.J.
Sure.
She gets up and Ron takes her place and starts typing.
RON
Okay. I'm gonna need to take your hard drive.
C.J.
Why?
RON
I just used tracer tools and the server and the IP address don't match. The address was
invented to disguise the origin.
C.J.
At my briefing yesterday, I made some remarks about a situation in Saudi Arabia.
I may have gone too far, I was thinking about apologizing.
RON
Yeah, this doesn't have anything to do with that.
C.J.
What do you mean?
RON
Mulsim extremists don't get personal. They don't know your name, they don't care. They
don't want one person, they want dozens or hundreds, that's why they don't use bullets.
Killing one person is a waste of a bomb. He wants you, why doesn't he want me? Someone
will be along in a few minutes to get your hard drive and we're intercepting all your
e-mails from the address. Thank you. [leaves]
CUT TO: INT. THE ROOSEVELT ROOM - DAY
IVANOVICH
The press conference can be moved to 9 o'clock.
SAM
Thank you.
IVANOVICH
And... excuse me. [whispers with Kozlowski] Thank you. Venue, yes. [to Sam] And the
venue can be moved to Hall of Mirrors.
SAM
Flags.
IVANOVICH
Yes. But we need something from you.
SAM
Okay.
IVANOVICH
On his arrival, and during outdoor photograph opportunity, President Bartlet must wear
overcoat.
SAM
Coat?
IVANOVICH
He must wear coat. He must wear gloves. Scarves and earmuffs - permissible, but optional.
SAM
Hang on. 'Cause yes, 'cause President Chigorin wants to wear a coat and doesn't want to
look like a wimp...
IVANOVICH
Sam, it is freezing too cold in Rheykjavik, it is freezing too cold in Helsinki, it is
freezing too cold in Staad, why must every American president bound out of an automobile
like he's at a yacht club, while in... excuse me, compare?
KOZLOWSKI
Comparison.
IVANOVICH
Comparison. While in comparison, our leader looks like... I don't even know what word is.
SAM
Frumpy?
IVANOVICH
I don't know what 'frumpy' is, but onomatopoetically, sounds right.
SAM
It's hard not to like a guy who doesn't know 'frumpy' but knows onomatopoeia. I'll talk to
the President about the coat. We'll have our final meeting tomorrow on the last points and
that will be that. [stands]
IVANOVICH
Thank you, sir.
SAM
Thank you. [leaves]
KOZLOWSKI
What is onomatopoe...
IVANOVICH
Sounds like. Sounds like.
CUT TO: INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS
Sam walks into it and meets Charlie.
CHARLIE
Well, you were right.
SAM
About what?
CHARLIE
The President never made a budget speech in Pittzburgh. He's nine, so he would have been
five or six at the time, maybe he thought everything was a budget speech.
SAM
Or maybe, it's just a crazy letter.
CHARLIE
It's not.
SAM
How do you know?
CHARLIE
'Cause I read a lot of crazy letters.
SAM
I got a letter last year asking me if I would donate my brain to a medical school in Granada.
I'll tell you, there are days when I think, "Yeah, why not just get it over with?"
They reach SAM'S OFFICE. Charlie stops at the door and Sam walks inside.
CHARLIE
He had his picture taken with the President. The advance guys always get the name and
address and we send a copy. There's no record of a picture being sent to this kid.
Plus, his father's in trouble.
SAM
Why?
CHARLIE
He's a furnace worker at the Franklin Mill and the kid said they may fire him 'cause he
wants to join a union. He spoke to a group called the Steel Workers Organizating Committee.
Have you ever heard of them?
SAM
Yeah, except they have a different name today.
CHARLIE
What?
SAM
The AFL-CIO and furnace workers are all unionized.
STAFFER
Charlie. [hands him a piece of paper]
Charlie reads the note and walks off. Toby passes him by.
TOBY
Hey, Charlie.
CHARLIE
Hey.
TOBY
Ms. Koss?
LUDMILA KOSS
[entering with Ginger] Yes.
TOBY
Toby Ziegler. Come on in.
Toby and Koss both walk in TOBY'S OFFICE.
TOBY
You write for the Novaya Gazeta.
KOSS
[sits down on the couch] Yes.
TOBY
Your circulation's gotten huge.
KOSS
[laughs] Highest daily in Rissia.
TOBY
And it's hard to tell whether that's because of your reporting, your editorials, or the
naked women on page three.
KOSS
[chuckles] We did not invent this thing, nor did we invent the comic strips or lotto.
TOBY
Touche, madam. [sits] So what did you do to piss off President Chigorin?
KOSS
President Chigorin does not like criticizm.
TOBY
Have you met someone who does?
KOSS
That is not the point.
TOBY
No, I... I'm just talking. [They laugh.] Listen, you're already credentialed to cover
our President, it's just a matter of putting you on a plane and, before I do that,
I want to check with the State department to make sure it's not a grotesquely insulting
thing to do to a new President from whom the US is hoping for quite a bit.
KOSS
Oh, so your first amendment only extends as far as it's polite?
TOBY
No, it extends farther then that but it only protects us. Believe me, if we were able to
inforce US law around the world, I'd retire and go scuba-diving.
KOSS
You like diving?
TOBY
I've never done it. I've... never done anything, but I've seen pictures and it looks fun.
I've seen pictures of people out there in the world, and they all look like they're glad
they are. Now, granted, when I'm looking at these pictures, somebody's usually trying to
sell me something, but tell you what: I'm 44 years old and I'm buying. I usually don't
talk this much, but I'm having an odd day. Want to stay for a little and look at pictures
of scuba-diving?
KOSS
No, thank you.
TOBY
[stands up] Okay, then. We'll talk tomorrow.
KOSS
Thank you very much. [leaves]
CUT TO: INT. THE MURAL ROOM - DAY
A meeting is over. People are leaving.
BARTLET
Thank you so much. Thank you.
LEO
Listen, before we go in there, let's stay a second and talk about Antares.
BARTLET
Yeah.
LEO
It's not like there's nothing we can do.
BARTLET
There's nothing we can do.
LEO
I'm not saying Commerce or Treasury calls the banks, but an emergency loan guarrantee
if we can get Congress to...
JOSH
[comes up as they exit the room] Good morning, sir.
BARTLET
Good morning. [to Leo] Yeah, we can't do it.
LEO
How did it go over there?
JOSH
Well, they confronted the RussiansAtomic Energy Minister with the photographs.
LEO
And?
JOSH
He denies everything.
BARTLET
That's good enough for me.
JOSH
He doesn't deny that they're building a reactor; they've had contracts with Iran since
'76 and he says that Deuterium-based reactors had been up and running in Canada for years.
They walk back into THE OVAL OFFICE. Fitzwallace is standing in it.
BARTLET
Well, Canada, Russia - roughly the same relationship with the US. Fitz, you old horse
thief, you old muckety-muck!
FITZWALLACE
Well, good morning again, sir.
BARTLET
Josh says the director of MinAtom says it's commercial power production.
FITZWALLACE
[as they both sit] Yeah, except that there are no power lines to and from the site.
And there's no reprocessing facility. This one's 50 megawatts thermal, which is identical
to the reactor Pakistan's got in Kushab. This isn't used to make the lights go; it's used
to make plutonium. Mr. President, I'm not your National Security Advisor, or your Secretary
of Defense or State. But the Russians are giving Iran the bomb.
BARTLET
Well, that's what was said by my National Security Advisor twenty minutes ago, right after
it was said by the Secretaries of State and Defense. And, for what it's worth, the directors
of the CIA, NSA, FBI and Naval Intelligence.
JOSH
Leo, isn't MinAtom in terrible shape?
LEO
It lost some customers after Chernobyl.
JOSH
[sits] Yeah, that's 'welcome to free markets the hard way,' but my point is the light water
reactor contracts are way behind schedule, there are all kinds of technical failures.
BARTLET
You think the Iranians forced them to build them a heavy water reactor?
JOSH
To satisfy the contracts, maybe.
BARTLET
Crap. And even if that were the case, it doesn't make them Jean Valjean. They want to power
broker in the Middle East. Just what the doctor ordered for the Middle East.
Bartlet stands up, and everyone else stands as well.
BARTLET
All right, while avoiding the biggest diplomacy disaster since I don't know when -
Josh, Leo, you guys have to figure out a way to get me out of it.
JOSH
Get him out of what?
LEO
He's not going to Helsinki. [leaves]
FADE OUT.
END ACT TWO
* * *
ACT THREE
FADE IN: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - DAY
WEDNESDAY
Josh and Leo sit across from each other.
JOSH
There's something... really good on television.
LEO
What?
JOSH
That's why he can't go, there's something really good on television and the President
doesn't know how to work a VCR.
Leo tosses his head back.
JOSH
Well, it's not that he doesn't know how to work it, they know he's got a staff and
wouldn't buy it. It's... It's that he doesn't trust technology.
LEO
Josh.
JOSH
This is insane!
LEO
News of the reactor is going to break, you know it will, and it's going to break at
the worst possible time. In fact, my money's on - it's gonna break right next to the
picture of him shaking hands with Chigorin. While wearing a coat, to protect his
MS-riddled body from the fierce climate in Finland.
JOSH
How can you guys, all of you, be so sure it's not MinAtom and the other Cold War
holdouts, the ex-Soviets, walking around...
LEO
I don't care who it is...
JOSH
There are other issues on the table! There's NATO expansion, the Caspian pipeline...
LEO
[shouting] You don't get to put it on in Iran! There are no other issues on the table
right now. We're going to have to fly over there and blow this thing up and given what
they're manufacturing there, I don't know if that's possible. [stands up and sits in
another chair] We were all so smart. Russia's hobbled, the next conflict's going to be
in the Middle East. Turns out it is in the Middle East. With the Russians.
JOSH
You haven't answered my question.
LEO
What question?
JOSH
Chigorin just took office four months ago. How can you be sure it's not a rogue thing?
LEO
I don't want a leak, Josh. Everyone's proceeding like we're going?
JOSH
Yes. How can you be sure?
LEO
I can't.
CUT TO: INT. COMMUNICATIONS OFFICE - DAY
Toby is walking through. A Man from State Department calls out to him.
MAN
Toby!
TOBY
Thanks for coming down.
MAN
Is there still a summit to go to?
They walk into TOBY'S OFFICE. Toby hastily closes his door.
TOBY
I'm sorry, what did you say?
MAN
I'm sorry about that. I ask because...
TOBY
Yeah. I mean, I wanted to talk to you because I'd been asked to put a reporter from
the Novaya Gazeta on the press plane.
MAN
That's a mistake.
TOBY
You understand I'm talking about a pencil and pad of paper, from which no one has ever died.
MAN
You understand there isn't a paper or any publication in Russia that is more critical
of the Chigorin government.
TOBY
Well, the editorial judgement aside, what's the damage assessment?
MAN
Well, the point of the summit is to build strong bilateral ties with the new
administration, so...
TOBY
We make it clear it's not personal.
MAN
How do you suggest we do that?
TOBY
I don't know... What are the things I can do?
MAN
We've got about half a dozen American reporters in Moscow whose credentials are pending.
Toby, this is like if they credentialed the Enquirer to cover the summit!
TOBY
If the Enquirer asked us, we'd credential them. Making sure the Enquirer can write whatever
it wants is the only way I can be sure the New York Times is writing whatever it wants.
MAN
Well, you asked me what I thought - I'm a hundred percent against it.
CUT TO: INT. OUTER OVAL OFFICE - DAY
C.J. is pacing nervously. Charlie walks out of the Oval Office.
CHARLIE
Okay.
C.J.
Thanks.
C.J. walks into THE OVAL OFFICE, where Bartlet and Ron Butterfield are standing.
C.J.
Good morning, Mr. President.
BARTLET
You're gonna get Secret Service protection, but I can't order it unless you sign this
piece of paper, so sign this piece of paper.
C.J.
Sir, can I ask why you feel it's necessary...
BARTLET
Because Ron says it is, and around here we do whatever Ron says.
C.J.
Well, I think it might be an over-reaction.
BARTLET
Good for you. With all your years of training and experience in sniffing out crime,
your opinion really carries a lot of weight with me.
C.J.
I don't want to appear fragile.
BARTLET
Are you kidding?
C.J.
Sir...
BARTLET
We're talking about one bodyguard. I have twelve, and that's before I leave the house.
You ever count the number of guns that come along with me when Abbey and I take in a
play at the Kennedy Center? Do I seem fragile to you?
C.J.
No, sir.
BARTLET
Then...
C.J.
You're also not a woman in a man's job. To say nothing of the fact that you're required
by law to be protected by the Treasury Department. You don't have a choice. And frankly,
sir, you and I both know that you score points frequently with the public and with the
press by shrugging off your Secret Service and doing whatever... going to a book store.
BARTLET
I don't care.
C.J.
Sir...
BARTLET
I don't care! You're part of my family, and this thing is happening and I simply won't
permit it. Sign the piece of paper.
C.J.
Look...
BARTLET
Let me tell you something! The last time a member of my staff got a death threat, they
missed him and hit me!
C.J.
Ron... is there any evidence... any evidence at all that this guy... Look, I work in the
White House, everybody knows that, but is there any evidence to suggest that...
She stops abruptly, intercepting a look Ron and Bartlet share. Bartlet nods to Ron.
Ron takes some photographs and shows them to C.J.
C.J.
[buttons her jacket nervously] Where did you get these?
RON
Today's e-mail.
C.J.
That's me leaving my house on Monday. This one's at a restaurant where I had dinner
with my niece. This one's from this morning... it was taken from about twenty feet away.
All right, okay. [walks to the table and signs the paper]
RON
Let's go outside and talk.
C.J.
Okay. Thank you, Mr. President.
C.J. and Ron step outside. Charlie walks in.
CHARLIE
Toby.
BARTLET
Yeah!
TOBY
[walks inside] Good morning, sir.
BARTLET [OS]
What's going on?
Charlie steps out.
TOBY [OS]
I just wanted to give you a heads up - the journal's going to run an editorial with
regard to broken promises in fiscal spending.
Charlie picks up some papers and returns to the Oval Office.
BARTLET
Oh man, the greatest campaign speech ever about money - FDR promises to tighten our belts.
What's he do when he gets here - spends more than we knew could be spent. And it's 'cause
he discovered it's better for long-term growth. [sits down to read]
TOBY
The journal probably wrote an editorial about his broken promises too.
BARTLET
Hey, I should be able to reference that speech. When did he give that? It was in the
industrial North East.
TOBY
Pittsburgh, PA.
Charlie is just on his way out when he hears this.
BARTLET
Charlie, FDR gave a budget speech in 1932 in Pittsburgh, can you get your hands on a copy?
CHARLIE
I'm sorry, sir?
BARTLET
I said, FDR gave a budget speech in 1932...
CHARLIE
Yeah. Yes, sir.
BARTLET
Okay.
TOBY
Thank you, Mr. President.
BARTLET
Mmm-hmmm.
Toby and Charlie leave. Leo walks in through another door.
LEO
Good morning.
BARTLET
How's it going?
LEO
Is there a TV show you really, really like?
BARTLET
No.
LEO
Then don't worry about it, let's talk about something else.
BARTLET
What?
LEO
Helping out Antares.
BARTLET
[sighs] Aaaah, was wilst du von mein Leben? What do you want from my life? The government
can't be in the business of cosigning loans.
LEO
We wouldn't be handing them a bag of unmarked bills, just backing the loans to cover
the cost of the recall.
BARTLET
[stands up] It's a subsidy.
LEO
It's a small one!
BARTLET
I'm an economist!
LEO
Sir! This was not a failure of business, it was... I don't know, it was a mistake,
it was human error, and Jake's been completely forth...
BARTLET
The marketplace will take care of Antares.
LEO
The marketplace will kill Antares.
BARTLET
That's what's supposed to happen.
LEO
It's not like it's unprecedented, sir. We helped out steel.
BARTLET
That was an industry that was hurt by unfair trade practices. Antares was hurt by their
own carelessness.
LEO
A loan guarantee doesn't cost the taxpayers a nickel.
BARTLET
Unless they go under and either way they've just said 'We're open for business.'
LEO
For a corporate icon that feeds into tech companies, computers, aerospace. The ripple
effects, workers losing jobs, it's a blue chip stock that's in every major...
BARTLET
[shouts] They were huge contributors! How the hell am I supposed... They were huge contributors!
LEO
Carelessness doesn't have to exist for a mistake to be made.
BARTLET
[sits at his desk] What?
LEO
You said it was carelessness and I don't believe carelessness has to exist for a mistake
to be made. Jake was a contributor, and he's never asked for a favor, not even now.
He was a contributor 'cause he knows us, and we know him, and we know, that if a mistake
happened in design or production at Antares it wasn't shoddy... it wasn't on the cheek.
You know how many chips have acted up so far? One. Dollars to donuts, he could have gotten
away with it. But he wanted to warn people they may have a problem before... I don't even
know what happens when 80 million computers stop working right. But tell me this isn't
exactly how we want American business to behave! I know it doesn't look good, he's a
friend of ours. But there is a reason he's a friend of ours.
BARTLET
They're announcing end of business tomorrow?
LEO
Yes, sir.
BARTLET
[sighs] I'm not saying anything, but grab some people and put together some numbers.
LEO
Yes, sir.
BARTLET
I'm not saying anything.
LEO
Thank you, Mr. President.
Leo walks out of the office.
FADE OUT.
END ACT THREE
* * *
ACT FOUR
FADE IN: INT. THE ROOSEVELT ROOM - DAY
THURSDAY
Sam is again in a meeting with Ivanovich and Kozlowski.
IVANOVICH
The Baltic herring industry was subject of recent trade agreement between Russians
and Finns. However, we'll take off menu.
SAM
Why?
IVANOVICH
We were asked to: Mrs. Bartlet likes shrimp.
SAM
That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. Put whatever you want on the menu.
IVANOVICH
Very well.
SAM
I would like to request that the press pool be allowed to take photographs in the
Arctic People's exhibit.
IVANOVICH
Also very well.
SAM
And that, my good friends, is that. It was a pleasure doing business with you.
KOZLOWSKI
Uh... we have one more.
SAM
Name it!
KOZLOWSKI
On the issue of the language in the joint statement.
SAM
Well, I can't negotiate language of the statement.
IVANOVICH
It's just a suggestion.
SAM
The language has been worked out with the State, Commerce, and Defense, it's way...
IVANOVICH
Will you hear suggestion, Sam?
SAM
Okay.
IVANOVICH
[clears throat, reads] "Both President Chigorin and myself agree that we must enter 21st
century as partners and friends, not as adversaries. We must lead way and stem in tide
of nuclear proliferation and we must start with ourselves, for why should two nations
still possess power to destroy each other ten times over; surely, once is enough."
SAM
Whose idea was this?
IVANOVICH
Mine.
SAM
Who wrote it?
IVANOVICH
I did. [hands him the notes] You will, uh... pass it up?
SAM
Yeah.
IVANOVICH
That's good one, yes?
SAM
Yes. Thank you.
CUT TO: INT. TOBY'S OFFICE - DAY
Ludmila Koss enters.
KOSS
Hello.
TOBY
Hello.
Toby points to the couch and picks up papers from his desk.
TOBY
Here are your credentials for the plane, here's your plane ticket, here are your
credentials for the Palace, the Saturday press conference, the Arctic Peoples exhibit,
the Sunday press conference, and the Hall of Flags.
KOSS
Thank you very much.
TOBY
Either way, I found out why Chigorin and his people have such a problem with you.
KOSS
It's because I don't flatter them.
TOBY
No, it's because you stink.
KOSS
I beg your pardon?
TOBY
You can beg all you want, you're not gonna get it. Last month, you alleged that the
Chigorin government bombed several apartment buildings based on an unattributed source.
It was refuted; you never retracted!
KOSS
The government's case was all over the television!
TOBY
[holds up a printout] Last week, you had a cover story about President Chigorin's
mother-in-law moving closer to the Kremlin. You printed her home address, she had to relocate.
KOSS
[stands up] Well, that's her decision.
TOBY
You reported the failing grades of the Defense Minister's twelve-year-old son! Does that
even count as journalism? Does that do anything but bring ridicule on a defenseless kid?
We've got people like you here, on cable and on the Internet, and there's no one anywhere
on the ideological spectrum that doesn't roll their eyes when their names are spoken out
loud. You know, we've always had free press here, we take it for granted... how can you
[crumples the paper] treat it like this?! You should give up your space and put another
naked woman in there! [beat] Anyway. Here are your credentials.
Toby throws them on the desk. Koss picks them up and leaves.
CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY
Several people including Fitz, Josh, Leo, and Bartlet are inside.
LEO
The Majority Leader moves up HMO reform.
BARTLET
He'll do that?
LEO
We've talked to him. He's moved up HMO reform, there's nothing we can do about it,
and the welfare of your people comes first.
Sam walks inside. Josh approaches him and reads what Sam gives him.
WOMAN
He has a Duma, he'll understand.
FITZWALLACE
This makes sense.
LEO
We save face and send a strong message.
BARTLET
Anybody? Can I use this to get out of weddings and stuff? [sits down] Sam, the Majority
Leader's gonna move up HMO reform and my Duma's gonna vote on it, what do you think?
JOSH
Sorry, sir, would you hear what Sam has to say for a moment?
BARTLET
What?
SAM
[walks forward with the note] Listen, I'd like to tell you about something and if, when
I'm done, you think I sounded like an idiot, just know that I'll be feeling like one as
well. Nikolai Ivanovich, the senior member of the logistical negotiating team, said he
had language he wanted added to the joint statement, and that he wrote it himself.
LEO
What's he getting involved with the language of the statement for?
SAM
Yeah. [opens the note] What he wanted added was, "Together in partnership, we must stem
the tide of nuclear proliferation, for why should our two nations still possess the power
to destroy themselves ten times over; surely once is enough." Now, I have to tell you,
sir, that both these negotiators had conversational English, but they didn't have idioms.
I promise you...
BARTLET
'Stem the tide" is an English idiom.
SAM
Yeah, and they don't have 'surely, once is enough' either.
JOSH
Sir, Chigorin wrote that.
SAM
I think he's trying to send you a message, Mr. President.
BARTLET
He is trying to send me a message.
EVERYONE
Exactly, Mr. President.
BARTLET
[stands up] We've been trying to get non-proliferation on the agenda, we've been trying
to put those exact words in Chigorin's mouth.
JOSH
He's got the whole Soviet defense establishment that's trying to do business.
FITZWALLACE
Wait a second! Hang on... You're telling me that foreign policy of this magnitude is
conducted through Sam and I'm still alive?
SAM
We're pretty impressed ourselves, Mr. Chairman.
FITZWALLACE
Why didn't he just have somebody pick up the phone?
JOSH
It's the old diplomatic corps, and he can't trust them yet, sir.
BARTLET
Fitz?
FITZWALLACE
I think he's going out on a limb. [stands up] I think you should meet him there.
BARTLET
Let's go to Helsinki. But the reactor's first thing on the agenda. Anybody?
LEO
Thank you, Mr. President.
BARTLET
Thanks, everyone! Thank you. Thanks!
The people begin to leave.
LEO
I've got Jake Kimball in my office.
BARTLET
I'll be right in. Sam!
SAM
Yes, sir.
BARTLET
Nice job.
SAM
Thank you.
BARTLET
Tell me again why I can't wear whatever the hell I want?
SAM
Well, that's not entirely true, sir: the earmuffs are optional.
BARTLET
I probably won't be wearing them.
SAM
Yes, sir. [leaves]
CUT TO: INT. LEO'S OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
Bartlet walks inside.
BARTLET
Whatever happened to Pong, huh? It was great, it was relaxing, it had that very
satisfying sound?
JAKE KIMBALL
I, uh... I don't know, sir.
BARTLET
Yeah, me neither. Leo?
Leo hands him a note, Bartlet reads it.
BARTLET
No. Leo wanted to see if we could guarantee a loan.
JAKE
I didn't know that. I can't ask you for that.
BARTLET
I appreciate that, and I can't give it to you, but I think I can do Leo one better.
LEO
What?
BARTLET
We'll stay his biggest customer. When you announce your recall, you can announce you're
keeping your government contracts. Leo will work it out with Congress.
JAKE
[overwhelmed] That's very generous, Mr. President. I appreciate your confidence.
BARTLET
Talk to me about the 75 thousand workers.
JAKE
I won't be taking any salary for two years and my managers will cut their salaries by
50 percent before we even consider laying anyone off.
BARTLET
All right. Jakie, this is the White House, if we only screw up twice before breakfast,
it was a very good morning.
JAKE
Yes, sir.
BARTLET
One more thing: you can't make any more campaign contributions to me, or any Democrat.
You can vote, but that's it.
JAKE
Yes, sir.
BARTLET
I knew I'd get screwed by a computer one day. [Leo smiles.] I have an important photo op,
excuse me. [leaves abruptly]
CUT TO: INT. THE MURAL ROOM - DAY
Charlie is inside when an old man is seen through the door.
NANCY
Charlie.
Charlie comes out.
CHARLIE
Mr. Tatum?
DR. TED TATUM
I'm Doctor Tatum, I'm the one you talked to on the phone. [They shake hands.]
This is my father.
CHARLIE
I'm Charlie Young. I'm personal aide to the President.
ALAN TATUM
Yes?
CHARLIE
You didn't tell him anything, right?
DR. TATUM
He thinks we're on Candid Camera.
TATUM
Or that this is a ruse of some kind. What the...
CHARLIE
It's not a ruse. [Nancy hands him papers.] When you were nine, you wrote this letter to
Franklin Roosevelt. You met him when he was governor of New York, and a candidate for
President.
TATUM
Well, I'll be damned.
CHARLIE
You met his personal aide, Tom Farley. That's me. Mr. Tatum, by any chance, the apartment
where you grew up in Pittsburgh, was it 2345 Northern...
TATUM
... State Boulevard.
CHARLIE
Yes. That's the only residential building in Pittsburgh that's been torn down recently.
In fact, it was just two weeks ago. Somebody found your letter and put the right postage on it.
TATUM
Well, would you look at what people do!
CHARLIE
I tell you, none of it would have happened, except there's a five-digit code that
Presidents give out to close friends, and President Bartlet copied his from FDR.
BARTLET
[approaches from behind] For the hundredth time, it was an homage!
CHARLIE
Yes, sir.
Bartlet shakes hands with Tatum.
BARTLET
Alan Tatum?
TATUM
Yes, sir!
BARTLET
The White House owes you one picture.
TATUM
Oh, my!
DR. TATUM
Let's go, Dad.
TATUM
Oh, Mr. President, this is my son, Ted.
BARTLET
[as they shake hands] Good to meet you!
TATUM
He's a doctor.
BARTLET
I'm sorry. I'm married to one. No, you meant that as a good thing! Let's go.
They walk into THE OVAL OFFICE.
BARTLET
FDR was a fine president, don't get me wrong, but if you want something done right,
dammit, call New Hampshire! Come in, please.
The Tatums enter and stand next to Bartlet as a photographer takes pictures.
BARTLET
Are you retired, Mr. Tatum?
TATUM
Yes, sir, 53 years on the Spirit of St. Louis. New York to St. Louis.
BARTLET
[to Dr. Tatum] Your grandfather was a furnace worker. Your father was on a railroad.
You couldn't find an honest work?
TATUM
I'd like my picture taken with that young man, if you don't mind.
BARTLET
Charlie! [motions for him to come over]
Charlie steps into the picture as Bartlet walks out and more shots are taken.
PHOTOGRAPHER
Thank you.
TATUM
[shakes hands with Charlie] Thank you.
DR. TATUM
Well, thank you very much, sir. This was really a once-in-a-lifetime experience for both of us.
BARTLET
Where are you going? You got pictures, what do you I get?
TATUM
I don't know what...
BARTLET
You were there, you were at his feet, you got to tell me everything! Sit, we're going to
get some food. [to Dr. Tatum] You sit quietly over there and try to resist temptation to
bill me for something.
Dr. Tatum laughs, as everyone sits down.
CUT TO: INT. BULLPEN AREA TO C.J.'S OFFICE - NIGHT
C.J. walks through to her office and sees an Agent standing in the doorway.
She slides past him inside.
C.J.
Hello.
SPECIAL AGENT SIMON DONOVAN
C.J. Cregg?
C.J.
Yeah.
SIMON
Special Agent Simon Donovan. I'm with the Treasury Department.
C.J.
Aha. What branch of the Treasury Department, Agent Donovan?
SIMON
[shows her a badge] U.S. Secret Service. I don't like flashing it around, it gives some
people the jumps. But Agent Butterfield said you were a reluctant customer.
C.J.
How does this work?
SIMON
What is it you'd like to know?
C.J.
Well, first of all, from how far away can you do this?
SIMON
I can respect a certain perimeter of privacy.
C.J.
What does that mean?
SIMON
I don't need to see you naked or anything.
C.J.
Okay.
SIMON
Though, 'better safe then sorry' is a bit of a motto for us at the Treasury. I don't know,
you're the boss. I'll be leading a detail of four agents each working a third of the day,
one day off a week. We'll set up a command post in your apartment building, set up
surveillance, you can put your car in a garage, you'll be using ours.
Carol walks in with some papers and leaves. C.J. walks out of her office, Simon follows.
C.J.
You can't come in the Briefing Room.
SIMON
A crowded room where anyone can get credentialed and you're up at the podium?
No, I'm pretty sure I'll be there.
C.J.
This is what you meant by I am the boss?
SIMON
Uh... yeah, I guess it's more of an honorary thing.
C.J. tries to open a door, Simon closes it in front of her.
SIMON
This guy isn't small-time, Ms. Cregg. You're being hunted. By the way, I can't guarantee
anything except to say that if you're dead, chances are I am, too.
C.J.
Well, I guess it's gonna have to be the little things now.
SIMON
Yeah. I'll check in with my command.
Simon leaves, as C.J. enters the next room, looking back at him. She shuts the door.
DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES.
FADE TO BLACK.
THE END
* * *
The West Wing and all its characters are a property of Aaron Sorkin, John Wells
Production, Warner Brothers Television and NBC. No copyright infringement is intended.
Episode 3.18 -- "Enemies Foreign and Domestic"
Original Airdate: May 1, 2002, 9:00 PM EST
Transcript by: Irene
September 10, 2002