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[10.16] Fraternal SchwinnsAct 1 Scene 1 - KACL [Fade in. Frasier is on the air.] Frasier: Gosh, it's been such fun talking about psycho-pharmacological solutions to maladaptive personality traits that I can't believe the three hours is almost gone. Up next is the news followed by... [Roz raps on the window and holds up a note that reads 'BIKE-A-THON".] Frasier: Oh, but Roz is reminding me that n..

[10.15] Trophy GirlfriendACT I [Scene 1 - Squash gym lobby. Niles is there. Frasier rushes in.] Frasier: Ooh, Niles, sorry I'm late. Did you sign us up? Niles: Um, Frasier, I've been thinking. How many years have we teamed up for the squash tournament, only to be eliminated in the second round? Frasier: Nine. Niles: Don't you think it's time we came up with a new strategy? Frasier: Niles, if you..

[10.14] Daphne Does DinnerAct 1 Scene 1 - Frasier's Apartment DINNER AT THE CRANES' ALREADY IN PROGRESS [Fade in. Frasier is standing with a woman. Niles is putting out a small fire back by the bookcase. Guests are leaving and the woman slaps Frasier.] Frasier: Mimsy, wait! Please, I can explain! Mimsy: Oh, don't bother! And I bet you don't even have Tourette's Syndrome! [She leaves.] Frasier: P..

[10.13] Lilith Needs A FavorAct 1 Scene 1 - An Airliner [Fade in. Lilith is sitting in first class reading a magazine. The man next to her (Albert) glances nervously at the window, then reaches across her to close the shade.] Albert: Sorry. I'm a nervous flyer. Lilith: Yes, I see. Oh, you're white as a sheet. Albert: No, actually, I'm always this pale. My ex-wife used to say she could tell when ..

[10.12] The Harassed ACT I [Scene 1 - KACL. Frasier is finishing a segment.] Frasier: We'll be right back with Julia Wilcox and our new stock market update after this. [He exits the air and removes his phones. Kenny enters.] Kenny: That's it? That's your big introduction for Julia? What happened to the copy I wrote for you? Frasier: [looking at the copy] Kenny, come on. "Julia" does not rhyme wi..

[10.11] Door Jam [Act 1 Scene 1 -Frasier's Apartment Martin is lying prone on a gurney. Daphne massages his hip.] Martin: Ow! All right, all right, I'll talk! Just make the pain stop. Daphne: Oh, shut up. I'm just trying to get the blood flowing. Martin: Oh, more like make me hemorrhage. Daphne: Don't tempt me. Martin: Oh, God, you broke something! Daphne: Too bad it wasn't your bloody pie hole!..

[10.10]We Two Kings[Act 1] [Scene 1 - Café Nervosa Fade in. Frasier enters and sees Roz seated at a table next to the counter. There is a waiter at the table with reindeer antlers on his head.] Frasier: Oh, hey Roz. Can I join you? Roz: Sure. Frasier: [to waiter] Ah... May I have a latté to go, please? And I... I hope that they're paying you extra to wear that. [He takes the seat across from Roz..

[10.9] Don't Go Breaking My Heart [3]ACT ONE Scene One - Frasier's apartment Roz, Martin, and Frasier are gathered around the dining table. Roz: So what's the plan? Are we going to turn off the lights and jump out and yell "surprise!" Frasier: Oh yes, Roz, let's startle a man who just had open-heart surgery. Roz: Sorry, I can't get used to thinking of Niles as "sick." Martin: Oh, Niles is great...